I was panicking..
Growing ⇉ Learning, Breathing ↻
From being locked in the apartment; self-quarantine; occasional back to the office and until today Team A & B. There's been so much stress going on.
The stress of finding a new normal of making the home into an office space; using con-calls to communicate with colleagues and clients. Not knowing where's the fine line between workspace and home space.
Spending time with friends online and chats; worrying that friendships will distance away just because we're not meeting in person. Yet, at the same time worry that the constant texting will seem to trouble/disturb them. The need for companionship becomes very real.
Until today, first day back to the office (Team B), all my worries piled up like a rising tsunami; while I was expecting it to crash anytime soon and then...it didn't.
False alarm.
All that worry became nothing.
That satisfaction and happiness of seeing people face to face. Talking with people without constantly guessing what are people like/thinking behind the screens. The immediate response of every conversation. All fears seem to subside immediately.
Only did I realise that all this while how I've taken companionship for granted.
There's a very real need for spending time and talking to each other.
I was panicking the moment I step into the office today.
But thank God, although lifestyle-wise there's definitely a new normal going on (temperature check; wear mask; social distancing etc.). However, the longing for connection with people; for relationships; friendships; deep heart-to-heart honest conversation never gets old.
I was really panicking big time. But at the end of the day, I can honestly say that I'm so much better now.
Of course, I would want to say "Shouldn't have worried in the first place".
Nevertheless, I would still want to acknowledge and validate all the feelings and come to peace with it. It was a challenging season, but it's now in the past.
𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘵 𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦; 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥
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